Why do you only see what you want to see

Dear Reader,

Think about the last time you bought something big. 

Maybe it was a phone, a laptop, or even a car. 

For days after, you kept seeing glowing reviews that echoed your choice, as if the universe was nodding in agreement. 

And those one-star warnings, you probably brushed them off without a second thought.

That is not just you being confident; that is your brain playing tricks on you. 

It is confirmation bias at work, the invisible filter that makes you notice what you already believe and ignore the rest.

The joy of being right (Tell me, about it):

In the 1960s, psychologist Peter Wason designed a deceptively simple experiment. 

He gave people a sequence of numbers — 2, 4, 6 — and asked them to guess the rule. 

Instead of testing ideas that might disprove their hunches, most participants searched for examples that confirmed them. 

So, they were not looking for the truth; they wanted to be right.

That is how confirmation bias works: we seek out validation, not contradiction. 

Brain imaging studies later showed why: when we encounter information that supports our beliefs, our reward centres light up. 

When we encounter information that challenges us, our response is often muted. 

Being right literally feels good (Ask me), and being wrong does not.

Shopping with blinkers on:

The bias is evident in everyday consumer life.

Apple fans are a perfect example.

They highlight every flattering review of the latest iPhone while downplaying competitor features (Samsung). 

You see, loyalty is not only about features, but it is also about identity.

Amazon shoppers skim reviews for the one that echoes their choice. 

The glowing five-star seems trustworthy, and the angry one-star doesn't matter.

Same with politics, bias bleeds into consumer choices. 

Conservatives and liberals do not just read different news; they wear different brands, eat at different restaurants, and signal identity with products as mundane as jackets and fast food.

Example:

Netflix thrives on confirmation bias. Its recommendation system keeps you hooked by feeding you more of what you already like. It's comforting, sure, but don't you think it's limiting your perception?

How 'us' marketers use it:

Marketers have long understood how to lean on the bias.

• Personalisation works because it confirms preferences. Amazon shows us versions of what we already bought, and Spotify sends us deeper into our favourite genre.

  
  

• Social proof is effective because it mirrors our identity. “Other busy parents love this product” feels persuasive because it reassures us that people like us know best.

  
  

• Segmentation works because it flatters beliefs. Prius ads emphasise eco-consciousness, whereas Pickup truck ads lean into rugged independence. Same category, different values.

  
  

• Post-purchase reassurance is effective because it reduces doubt. “Ninety per cent of owners recommend this product” is less about fact and more about making us feel right.

The risks:

Leaning too hard on confirmation bias has consequences.

Personalisation engines like YouTube and TikTok risk creating filter bubbles so tight that people rarely encounter alternative perspectives.

I genuinely believe the filter bubble is the most dangerous thing happening to us when it comes to confirmation bias.

Confirmation bias powers scams and pseudoscience, such as miracle diets, anti-vaccine claims, and financial frauds, which flourish because people seek information that confirms their hopes or fears and ignore the rest.

So, what's the big picture:

We do not see the world as it is; we see the version that fits what we already believe.

For marketers, the lesson is clear: use confirmation bias, but with care. 

Offer reassurance, speak to identity, personalise, but balance comfort with novelty. Too much validation creates echo chambers. 

Too much challenge creates backlash. 

The smartest brands strike a balance, making people feel secure while keeping them curious.

So here is a million-dollar question for you?. 

Have you ever scrolled past a negative review simply because it did not fit the story you wanted to tell yourself? 

Cheers!

Akanksha